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CTD - Cloak Autopsy


RustedSoul

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Now that we have a non conflicting live version cranking..

Who's up for a little Autopsy :naughty:

Current version (sorry, no idea who wrote it)
Cloak Autopsy.

Some would say that the best description of an Ethereal is that it's all skin and bones. Even this statement, however would be an exaggeration of it's physical health. The Ethereal has very little bone mass, very little muscle mass, and the skin is so thin and fragile that almost anything can damage it. It's digestive system is also so pitiful that it can only absorb pre-digested food. Even the heart and lungs aren't very well developed.

This young scientist’s words immediately became the new motto for the x-corps science department. However, our scientists were entirely baffled when they began the dissection. It seemed that such a being should not be capable of existing on this planet. Soon, however - after discovering the highly developed brain and complex blood and nervous systems from the heart to the brain - it was clear that this creature relied primarily on it's brain for survival. This lead our scientists to believe that the Ethereals have telekinetic powers which allow them to pump blood to their brains, and to support their bodies, not only keeping them alive but allowing them to levitate themselves. This belief is only furthered by the lack of both footwear and calluses on the feat, meaning that they must not have walked

Scientists still have no explanation as to how or why Ethereals are capable of telekinesis. Luckily, according to our scientists, the Ethereals' telekinetic powers will probably not affect anything farther than a foot away from their bodies, meaning that they will not significantly effect the outcome of a battle. However, scientists believe that a brain as powerful as an ethereal's could possibly interfere with, and even send messages to, human brains from a distance. The robes that were removed from the Ethereal are assumed to have been used for protection. Scientists also believe that they may have been used to increase the ethereal's stature in the eyes of both friend and foe.

“Eww that’s disgusting, let’s start dissecting it.” - a newly assigned x-corps scientist.
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Well shucks d'ere Mr. Rusted, I'll do a liddle tinkerin for ye.
---------------------
Cloak Autopsy.

Some would say that the best description of an [color="red"]Cloak[/color] is that it's all skin and bones. Even this statement, however would be an exaggeration of it's physical health. The [color="red"]Cloak[/color] has very little bone mass, very little muscle mass, and the skin is so thin and fragile that almost anything can damage it. It's digestive system is also so pitiful that it can only absorb pre-digested food. Even the heart and lungs aren't very well developed.

This young scientist’s words immediately became the new motto for the [color="red"]X[/color]-corps science department. However, our scientists were entirely baffled when they began the dissection. It seemed that such a being should not be capable of existing on this planet. Soon, however - after discovering the highly developed brain and complex blood and nervous systems from the heart to the brain - it was clear that this creature relied primarily on it's brain for survival. This lead our scientists to believe that the [color="red"]Cloaks[/color] have telekinetic powers which allow them to pump blood to their brains, and to support their bodies, not only keeping them alive but allowing them to levitate themselves. This belief is only furthered by the lack of both footwear and calluses on the feat, meaning that they must not have walked

Scientists still have no explanation as to how or why [color="red"]Cloaks[/color] are capable of telekinesis. Luckily, according to our scientists, the [color="red"]Cloaks[/color]' telekinetic powers will probably not affect anything farther than a foot away from their bodies, meaning that they will not significantly effect the outcome of a battle. However, scientists believe that a brain as powerful as an [color="red"]Cloak's[/color] could possibly interfere with, and even send messages to, human brains from a distance. The robes that were removed from the [color="red"]Cloaks[/color] are assumed to have been used for protection. Scientists also believe that they may have been used to increase the [color="red"]Cloak's[/color] stature in the eyes of both friend and foe.

“Eww that’s disgusting, let’s start dissecting it.” - a newly assigned [color="red"]X[/color]-corps scientist.

--------
Well, me thinks we should take more of a scientific approach in regards to the Cloak Autopsy.
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[quote name='RustedSoul' date='Oct 26 2004, 03:13 AM']Hmm, I think we should tag team it.. Would you do the honours of starting please Dr. Azrael

We'll conduct this one through the pm system ^_^
[right][post="98767"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post][/right][/quote]

Roger roger.
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All right, RustedSoul and I have put this together. Let's hear some comments ^_^

CLOAK AUTOPSY
X-NET ENTRY//848291.557/DELTACL/EP/5/PERSEUSNET/ALIEN/AUTOPSIES/CLOAK

The Alien creatures known as Cloaks are, undoubtedly, the fiercest enemies our troopers have faced on the battlefield. With this in mind, it was very surprising to discover that its physical appearance is one of amazingly weak disposition, being little more than skin and bones. Osseous, muscular and adipose tissue mass are incredibly inadequate for a creature of this size, leaving this species with little natural resistance to physical damage.

Their digestive system is extremely inefficient, the creatures require pre-digested food. Also, these Aliens do not possess a fully functional excretory system; rather the large intestine circulates back into the stomach making it impossible for the Alien to eat food from which it can not absorb all molecular components, having instead to feed with aliments containing only the determined proteins, glucose and lipids the creature needs to survive.

The cranial cavity accommodates a remarkably sophisticated brain; both the incredibly advanced cerebrum and abducens nerve are practically encased in an immense array of swelled cerebral arteries. Certain characteristics of the brain and parts of the central nervous system seem unnaturally developed and made more effective by some undetermined stimuli. With such an extensive neural network supporting the brain’s anatomic complexity, it is obvious that the Cloaks are capable of almost limitless psionic abilities and levels of physical manipulation through thought. As a result, scientists believe the most viable conclusion is that the Cloak is fruit of genetic manipulation and selective breeding.

The level of atrophy reached by the physical body suggests that the creature has evolved to its current form through constant dependency on psionic abilities. Their physical strength is so limited that they are unable to support the weight of their own bodies, forcing them to make constant use of these abilities in order to move. The cardiovascular system is woefully underdeveloped and not suited for our planet’s atmosphere, the atmospheric pressure is too much for it to handle and without Psionic assistance scientists conclude that the creature's death would result within 1 month due to intensive cardiovascular strain. The respiratory system is underdeveloped as well, but functional enough to allow the creature to breathe on our planet.


“Eww! It’s disgusting, let’s start dissecting it!” - A newly assigned X-Corps scientist
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Azrael tags Rusted who then leaps off the corner post and bashes one word with a chair.
--------------
CLOAK AUTOPSY
X-NET ENTRY//848291.557/DELTACL/EP/5/PERSEUSNET/ALIEN/AUTOPSIES/CLOAK

The Alien creatures known as Cloaks are, undoubtedly, the fiercest enemies our troopers have faced on the battlefield. With this in mind, it was very surprising to discover that its physical appearance is one of amazingly weak disposition, being little more than skin and bones. Osseous, muscular and adipose tissue mass are incredibly inadequate for a creature of this size, leaving this species with little natural resistance to physical damage.

Their digestive system is extremely inefficient, the creatures require pre-digested food. Also, these Aliens do not possess a fully functional excretory system; rather the large intestine circulates back into the stomach making it impossible for the Alien to eat food from which it can not absorb all molecular components, having instead to feed with aliments containing only the determined proteins, glucose and lipids the creature needs to survive.

The cranial cavity accommodates a remarkably sophisticated brain; both the incredibly advanced cerebrum and abducens nerve are practically encased in an immense array of swelled cerebral arteries. Certain characteristics of the brain and parts of the central nervous system seem unnaturally developed and made more effective by some undetermined stimuli. With such an extensive neural network supporting the brain’s anatomic complexity, it is obvious that the Cloaks are capable of [color="red"]extraordinary[/color] psionic abilities and levels of physical manipulation through thought. As a result, scientists believe the most viable conclusion is that the Cloak is fruit of genetic manipulation and selective breeding.

The level of atrophy reached by the physical body suggests that the creature has evolved to its current form through constant dependency on psionic abilities. Their physical strength is so limited that they are unable to support the weight of their own bodies, forcing them to make constant use of these abilities in order to move. The cardiovascular system is woefully underdeveloped and not suited for our planet’s atmosphere, the atmospheric pressure is too much for it to handle and without Psionic assistance scientists conclude that the creature's death would result within 1 month due to intensive cardiovascular strain. The respiratory system is underdeveloped as well, but functional enough to allow the creature to breathe on our planet.


“Eww! It’s disgusting, let’s start dissecting it!” - A newly assigned X-Corps scientist
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  • 1 month later...
[quote]The level of atrophy reached by the physical body suggests that the creature has evolved to its current form through constant dependency on psionic abilities. Their physical strength is so limited that they are unable to support the weight of their own bodies, forcing them to make constant use of these abilities in order to move. [color="red"]The cardiovascular system is woefully underdeveloped and not suited for our planet’s atmosphere, the atmospheric pressure is too much for it to handle and without Psionic assistance scientists conclude that the creature's death would result within 1 month due to intensive cardiovascular strain.[/color] [color="blue"]The respiratory system is underdeveloped as well, but functional enough to allow the creature to breathe on our planet.[/color][/quote]

Ok, I looked but the cardiovascular system (definition and what not) and found out that the respiratory system is [b]apart[/b] of the cardiovascular system. This means that the blue sentence is redundant. I guess it's time for a little snip snip.
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CLOAK AUTOPSY
X-NET ENTRY//848291.557/DELTACL/EP/5/PERSEUSNET/ALIEN/AUTOPSIES/CLOAK

The Alien creatures known as Cloaks are, undoubtedly, the fiercest enemies our troopers have faced on the battlefield. With this in mind, it was very surprising to discover that its physical appearance is one of amazingly weak disposition, being little more than skin and bones. Osseous, muscular and adipose tissue mass are incredibly inadequate for a creature of this size, leaving this species with little natural resistance to physical damage.

Their digestive system is extremely inefficient, the creatures require pre-digested food. Also, these Aliens do not possess a fully functional excretory system; rather the large intestine circulates back into the stomach making it impossible for the Alien to eat food from which it can not absorb all molecular components, having instead to feed with aliments containing only the determined proteins, glucose and lipids the creature needs to survive.

The cranial cavity accommodates a remarkably sophisticated brain; both the incredibly advanced cerebrum and abducens nerve are practically encased in an immense array of swelled cerebral arteries. Certain characteristics of the brain and parts of the central nervous system seem unnaturally developed and made more effective by some undetermined stimuli. With such an extensive neural network supporting the brain’s anatomic complexity, it is obvious that the Cloaks are capable of extraordinary psionic abilities and levels of physical manipulation through thought. As a result, scientists believe the most viable conclusion is that the Cloak is fruit of genetic manipulation and selective breeding.

The level of atrophy reached by the physical body suggests that the creature has evolved to its current form through constant dependency on psionic abilities. Their physical strength is so limited that they are unable to support the weight of their own bodies, forcing them to make constant use of these abilities in order to move. The cardiovascular system is woefully underdeveloped and not suited for our planet’s atmosphere, the atmospheric pressure is too much for it to handle and without Psionic assistance scientists conclude that the creature's death would result within 1 month due to intensive cardiovascular strain.

“Eww! It’s disgusting, let’s start dissecting it!” - A newly assigned X-Corps scientist
--------

Cut of the one thing in the one paragraph that the other thing was already talking about.
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Hmmm, actually, if I'm not mistaken, cardiovascular is the heart and something else i don't know the word for, respiratory are the lungs (and maybe other things).
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[quote name='Azrael' date='Dec 29 2004, 03:18 PM']Hmmm, actually, if I'm not mistaken, cardiovascular is the heart and something else i don't know the word for, respiratory are the lungs (and maybe other things).
[right][post="105140"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post][/right][/quote]

Well I've look on the net and some say the heart, blood vessels, arteries, and whatnot. Others say it's those AND the lungs. The main idea of the cardiovascular system is to circulate blood through the body, sending oxygen to where it's needed. I think the gravity and what not of earth would cause more problems for this system than the respiratory system (breathing, lungs, other body parts).
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  • 1 month later...
I don't think it really matters really...Isn't the most important part of the Cloak his brain? Why does the brain only get one paragraph and his body get 3? Personally, I think the most interesting aspect of the autopsy should be the structure of the brain.

Some suggestions:

[quote]The Alien creatures known as Cloaks are, undoubtedly, the fiercest enemies our troopers have faced on the battlefield.[/quote]

Since when were Cloaks "fierce", not to mention "fiercEST"? I don't think fierce is a very applicable word to describe a cloak; terrifying, haunting, disturbing, etc. maybe but fierce i don't think so (pictures morlock leader bellowing out a rageful battle cry to his squad as they rush the humans wholed up in a trench and then feasting on their flesh after the battle is victorious...now THATS fierce :) ).


[quote]having instead to feed with aliments containing only the determined [i]proteins, glucose and lipids[/i] the creature needs to survive.[/quote]

Sounds a little too scientific, every player might not have taken biology class and might rather hears something like "nutrients, vitamins, minerals, etc." rather than glucose and lipids. Just a suggestion, I know what they are but not everyone else does :).


[quote]With such an extensive neural network supporting the brain’s anatomic complexity, it is obvious that the Cloaks are capable of extraordinary psionic abilities and levels of physical manipulation through thought.[/quote]

Do WHAT?!? l ol since when does an extensive neural network and complex brain equal even extraordinary psionic abilities. Relative to all other life we have studied thus far humans have a hugely complex brain and neural network but I'm not floating around. This sentence really screams Non Sequiter to me. I would like to see more about how the complex brain leads to psionic ability or at least a sentence explaining that scientists do not yet understand how the brain creates these amazing powers. This goes back to my point about elaborating on the brain, the Cloak is almost all brain please describe it more than the body!


[quote]Their physical strength is so limited that they are unable to support the weight of their own bodies, forcing them to make constant use of [i]these abilities[/i] in order to move.[/quote]

I would suggest "psionic levitation" or something more specific, it feels like the word "psionic ability" was read too far before you refer to it ambiguosly like this.



Ok well, just s ome suggestions. I actually enjoyed reading it a lot so great work!
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Oh also I just read the terror disk xnet in the progress build and it also says somethign along the lines of "The most fierce enemy on the battlefield", and who knows where else it could be found (probably in the morlocks too). So it is now necessary to change one of these two ctds at least. There are more descriptive words than fierce though so lets try something else out (thesaurus anyone?)
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Yeah, I've seen the same thing with "pinnacle" and "truly" and a few others words. Good observation!

Hm... fierce... These words might work, though they aren't all synonymous: aggressive, vicious, frightening, malicious, malevolent... Edited by Astyanax
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[quote name='JakeDrake' date='Feb 3 2005, 02:51 PM']Oh also I just read the terror disk xnet in the progress build and it  also says somethign along the lines of "The most fierce enemy on the battlefield", and who knows where else it could be found (probably in the morlocks too).  So it is now necessary to change one of these two ctds at least.  There are more descriptive words than fierce though so lets try something else out (thesaurus anyone?)
[right][post="109560"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post][/right][/quote]

That will be fixed, we cannot have the Terror-Discs be fiercer than Cloaks :P
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  • 1 year later...
  • 3 weeks later...

Hello again, everyone. Mad contacted me about doing another CTD, and said this was open, so I trhought I would take a crack at it. This is still a very rough form, and I would like to give credit where credit is do and say that I would like to integrate some ideas from the previous version of the entry (digestive, circulatory, and respiratory system stuff), but did not want to cannabalize what's not mine before getting feedback.

 

As I mentioned, this is a very rough version and I'm all about feedback and suggestions, so please: post away.

 

Cloak Autopsy

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: “Keep your wits about you, and you’ll live to see another day.” Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted by the terrifying entity known as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier’s will. After retrieval of a Cloak corpse, Command was very interested to learn what made this creature so devastating to our units.

 

Though quite forbidding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named, Cloaks appear to be rather physically stunted when stripped of it. It is true that they are very tall, towering over most humans, but this stature is supported by a spindly, atrophied body. The musculature is underdeveloped and barely adequate for basic locomotion. Bone structure appears to be quite brittle, with little force required to snap. One almost has the feeling that these creatures are malnourished, or malformed. Most weapons systems should be more than adequate in killing these creatures, as they do not have any natural armor such as that seen on other alien creatures.

 

Careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working on data simultaneously, the cloak mind seems to be divided into sixteen equal parts, all handling various systems and functions of the body without any direct conscious thought. All functions of the Cloak’s body have become autonomic, allowing their thoughts to focus only on their current objectives. When you consider that the apparent thought control of soldiers reported by field units is just another autonomic function of the Cloak, it makes these foes even more fearsome.

 

The level of intelligence and thought that Cloaks are capable of make it likely that they are the generals of the alien invasion forces, if not the leaders themselves. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the alien threat.

Edited by Denevive
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when you start to modify this text, please try to focus it on the actual physical findings and limit the functional things to assumptions based on findings. right now, there's too much information about brain function in my opinion... a lot of stuff that can't be read from an autopsy, at least not with this certainty.
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I didn't want to steel what wasn't mine. :) I'd be happy to lift it along with a few other things with your permission.

 

As for the ability to determine the motor control and cogintive capacity of a creature by way of dissection: this is actually how most research into the way that the brain interacts with the body is done. While we are now able to perform experiments on live subjects using electro-radiographs, much of our knowledge about how the mind affects motor control was learned during autopsy. Dissection of biological specimens is still our primary way of determining a creatures potential capabilites. While I did stretch the basic concept to include the idea that mind-disruption/control could be measured as an autonomic function, all other statements are easily determined based on autopsy.

 

I figured that it would be best to focus on the brain in this entry, as that is what makes this creature truly unique. Other info was held back to see if I could grab some of RustedSoul and Azrael's entry.

Edited by Denevive
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An autopsy doesn't have to rely on just cutting people open. Histological, Zytological, Microbiological and Molocular biological methods are included as well these days. This might help you when writing about the brain. Nevertheless, the information you included in the CT ("the cloak mind seems to be divided into sixteen equal parts, all handling various systems and functions of the body without any direct conscious thought. All functions of the Cloak’s body have become autonomic, allowing their thoughts to focus only on their current objectives"), can only be obtained on a live specimen.
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  • 1 year later...

-cleaned out some of the ascii so it was easier to read

-added the fluff

 

Cloak Autopsy

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted by the terrifying entity known as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will. After retrieval of a Cloak corpse, Command was very interested to learn what made this creature so devastating to our units.

 

Though quite forbidding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named, Cloaks appear to be rather physically stunted when stripped of it. It is true that they are very tall, towering over most humans, but this stature is supported by a spindly, atrophied body. The musculature is underdeveloped and barely adequate for basic locomotion. Bone structure appears to be quite brittle, with little force required to snap. One almost has the feeling that these creatures are malnourished, or malformed. Most weapons systems should be more than adequate in killing these creatures, as they do not have any natural armor such as that seen on other alien creatures.

 

Careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working on data simultaneously, the cloak mind seems to be divided into sixteen equal parts, all handling various systems and functions of the body without any direct conscious thought. All functions of the Cloak's body have become autonomic, allowing their thoughts to focus only on their current objectives. When you consider that the apparent thought control of soldiers reported by field units is just another autonomic function of the Cloak, it makes these foes even more fearsome.

 

The level of intelligence and thought that Cloaks are capable of make it likely that they are the generals of the alien invasion forces, if not the leaders themselves. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the alien threat.

 

Eww! It's disgusting, lets start dissecting it! - A newly assigned X-Corps scientist

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CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted by the terrifying entity known as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will. After retrieval of a Cloak corpse, Command was very interested to learn needs rephrasing, maybe remove "Command" (gotta check the writting guidelines) what made this creature so devastating to X-Corps personnel.

 

Though quite forbidding rephrasing? in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks are psysically shunted once deprived of their clothing. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with an underdeveloped musculature seemingly supporint only basic locomotion locomotion? Wouldn't say so and a bone structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem non-capable of any physical punishment, and the subjects encountered thus far don't use any kind of armor, natural or artificial.

 

Nevertheless, careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working on data simultaneously, the cloak mind seems to be divided into sixteen equal parts, all handling various systems and functions of the body without any direct conscious thought. All functions of the Cloak's body have become autonomic, allowing their thoughts to focus only on their current objectives. That's the case with most animals right? I don't think that I have to think about keeping my heart beating... ;). Maybe say that they can focus on multiple complex tasks simultaniously. I think I get what the author wanted to say in the next sentence, but "another autonomic function" seems wrong. When you consider that the apparent thought control of soldiers reported by field units is just another autonomic function of the Cloak, it makes these foes even more fearsome.

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and managment of the Alien Invasion. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

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para 2

 

hehe think it was meant to be foreboding before nakedness :P

 

Though quite forbidding foreboding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks are psysically shunted once deprived of their clothing.
Edited by RustedSoul
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CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted by the terrifying entity known as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will. After retrieval of a Cloak corpse, Command was very interested to learn what made this creature so devastating to X-Corps personnel.

 

Though quite forbidding foreboding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks are psysically shunted once deprived of their clothing garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with an that underdeveloped musculature seemingly supporint supports only basic locomotion functionality and a bone structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem non-capable of any physical punishment seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment, and the subjects encountered thus far don't use any kind of armor, natural or nor artificial.

 

Nevertheless, careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working on data simultaneously, the cloak mind seems to be divided into sixteen equal parts, all handling various systems and functions of the body without any direct conscious thought. All functions of the Cloak's body have become autonomic, allowing their thoughts to focus only on their current objectives and multiple complex tasks simultaniously. When you consider that the apparent thought control of soldiers reported by field units is just another autonomic function of the Cloak, it makes these foes even more fearsome.

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and management of the Alien Invasion. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

 

 

CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted by the terrifying entity known as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will.

 

Though quite foreboding in the characteristic clothing which they are named after, Cloaks are psysically shunted once deprived of their garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with underdeveloped musculature that seemingly supports only basic functionality and a bone structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment, and the subjects encountered thus far don't use any kind of armor, natural nor artificial.

 

Nevertheless, careful dissection of the corpse provided interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working on data simultaneously, the cloak mind seems to be divided into sixteen equal parts, all handling various systems and functions of the body without any direct conscious thought. All functions of the Cloak's body have become autonomic, allowing their thoughts to focus both on their current objectives and multiple complex tasks simultaniously.

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and management of the Alien Invasion. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

Edited by RustedSoul
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RS, if it's not a problem to you, could you please mark your changes in colour? It'll greatly help us spot the changed parts (that's most important now that we all are extremely busy with RL and university).

Unless of course you've changed/improved most of the text (and when you "resurrect" a very old CT, colours are of no use then)

Thanks :)

 

I've got no time to check the text for anything except from spelling/syntax errors :/

CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted by the terrifying entity known as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will.

 

Though quite foreboding in the characteristic clothing which they are named after, Cloaks are physically shunted once deprived of their garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with underdeveloped musculature that seemingly supports only basic functionality and a bone structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment, and the subjects encountered thus far don't use any kind of armor, natural nor artificial.

 

Nevertheless, careful dissection of the corpse provided interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working on data simultaneously, the cloak mind seems to be divided into sixteen equal parts, all handling various systems and functions of the body without any direct conscious thought. All functions of the Cloak's body have become autonomic, allowing their thoughts to focus both on their current objectives and multiple complex tasks simultaneously.

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and management of the Alien Invasion. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

Edited by kafros
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  • 3 weeks later...
CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted by with? the terrifying entity known to us? as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will I don't fully understand what you want to say with this sentence. Maybe clarify?.

 

Though quite foreboding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks are psysically shunted once deprived of their garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with an that underdeveloped musculature that seemingly supports only only supports? basic functionality and a bone skeletal? structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment stress?,. and the subjects encountered thus so? far don't use any kind of armor, neither? natural nor artificial.

 

Nevertheless, careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working on data simultaneously this is not quite correct. True for motoric and sensoric functions, not true for higher functions as speech or cognitive functions. Here after the loss of one centre on one side, the other hemiphere can learn to do the work of its counterpart, but originally it has either a different or no task. So I guess what I want to say, is that in the human brain there are also specialized zones as claimed later for the cloak brain. So I suggest either keeping it out, or adding something like "sensoric input" or whatever... , the cloak mind seems to be divided into sixteen equal why equal? parts, all handling various systems and functions of the body without any direct conscious thought No big difference to the human brain. All functions of the Cloak's body have become autonomic, allowing their thoughts to focus only on their current objectives and multiple complex tasks simultaniously The human body is also very autonomous - only a small part of the brain is responsible for high level coordination of the body functions.

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and management of the Alien Invasion Forces?. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

 

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CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment stress?,. and the subjects encountered thus so? far don't use any kind of armor, neither? natural nor artificial.

According to zombie's research, the cloak (ethereal) is one of the most heavily armored units on the battlefield. Only the Sectopod and Silicoid exceed it.

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CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment stress?,. and the subjects encountered thus so? far don't use any kind of armor, neither? natural nor artificial.

According to zombie's research, the cloak (ethereal) is one of the most heavily armored units on the battlefield. Only the Sectopod and Silicoid exceed it.

 

That's due to their mental abilities. If an Ethereal was somehow deprived of them, they would be extremely incapable of physical punishment

 

It's an "only brain matters" thing

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That's due to their mental abilities. If an Ethereal was somehow deprived of them, they would be extremely incapable of physical punishment

 

It's an "only brain matters" thing

Huh? :blink:

 

Among all the primary races in the game, the Ethereal (Cloak) has the highest armor. That's a fact. It's kinda hard to imagine how they got the strongest armor, but I always imagined the orange cloak they wear protects them somehow. It's our job to explain this. ^_^

 

- Zombie

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extracted from the cloak ctd

 

A mystery to us is why they wear insidious robes to cover their bodies. Currently there are three theories. One is that they wear them to intimidate their enemies and therefore gain a psychological advantage in battle. Another is that it somehow enhances their already powerful psionic abilities even more. The last theory states that the clothing is a form of ceremonial dress for some sort of cult or religion, but lack of pertinent data makes it impossible to corroborate this theory.

 

thus far the garments seem to play a "spiritual" role so could we perhaps get away with saying they wear a thin alien alloy polymer vest or whatever underneath/within the robe? or would that sound kinda cheesy..

Edited by RustedSoul
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extracted from the cloak ctd

 

A mystery to us is why they wear insidious robes to cover their bodies. Currently there are three theories. One is that they wear them to intimidate their enemies and therefore gain a psychological advantage in battle. Another is that it somehow enhances their already powerful psionic abilities even more. The last theory states that the clothing is a form of ceremonial dress for some sort of cult or religion, but lack of pertinent data makes it impossible to corroborate this theory.

 

thus far the garments seem to play a "spiritual" role so could we perhaps get away with saying they wear a thin alien alloy polymer vest or whatever underneath/within the robe? or would that sound kinda cheesy..

I'm not sure we could get away with simply saying the alien wears a vest against its body. But a lining inside the cloak I could handle. What do you think? In any case, we need to rewrite that paragraph a bit to reflect the change. :)

 

- Zombie

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hehehe i think the ctd can get away with almost anything however you're right zombie. how about something like this for the second para :)

 

Though quite foreboding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks are psysically shunted once deprived of their garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with an

underdeveloped musculature that seemingly supports only basic functionality and a skeletal structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment or stress. The subjects encountered so far don't use any kind of obvious armor, however, their garments are composed of interwoven alien alloy strands in similar fashion to that of chain mail and fabrics completely foreign to us.

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Much better, RS! :)

 

I did a little work on this text this afternoon and attempted to address some of Mad's points an tried to clean it up a bit in the process. Not sure if anything can be used but here is my revision (strikethroughs for deletions, Red text for notes, Green Text for additions and Purple Text for reworded areas):

 

CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted with the terrifying entity known to us as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will. NOTE: I don't know, Mad. The last sentence seems pretty clear to me.

 

Though quite foreboding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks are appear physically shunted once deprived of their garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with an underdeveloped musculature that seemingly supports only basic functionality and a skeletal structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment or stress and the subjects encountered so far don't use any kind of obvious inherent armor. However, their garments are composed of latent alien alloy strands interwoven with filaments of unknown origin in similar fashion to that of chain mail.

 

Careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working more or less independent of each other, the Cloak mind seems to be divided into sixteen four adjoining quadrants which are capable of handling multiple complex tasks in unison. This divide and conquor approach speeds up processing of a problem and the interconnected brain is capable of tremendous feats of mental ability. NOTE: I don't think any normal or hybrid brain would be able to function with 16 parts vying for something to do. (Not every part would be excercised and invariably would decay due to lack of use). I'm not saying that 4 parts are any better than 16, but it is at least more believable.

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and management of the Alien Invasion Forces. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

 

- Zombie

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  • 2 months later...
First para last sentence

 

Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will.

 

Would exchanging "will" for "mind" add clarity and still sound ok? any and all opinions are most welcome :)

 

Also, I still feel the text needs a little something, any ideas there would be most appreciated.

 

CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted with the terrifying entity known to us as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will.

 

Though quite foreboding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks appear physically shunted once deprived of their garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with an underdeveloped musculature that seemingly supports only basic functionality and a skeletal structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment or stress and the subjects encountered so far don't use any kind of inherent armor. However, their garments are composed of latent alien alloy strands interwoven with filaments of unknown origin in similar fashion to that of chain mail.

 

Careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working more or less independent of each other, the Cloak mind seems to be divided into four adjoining quadrants which are capable of handling multiple complex tasks in unison. This divide and conquer approach speeds up processing of a problem and the interconnected brain is capable of tremendous feats of mental ability.

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and management of the Alien Invasion Forces. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

Edited by RustedSoul
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It reads pretty good so far, but like you mentioned it still needs something. :)

 

I was thinking that because the Cloak is basically the "controlling race" we should mention that this species doesn't have any implanted cybernetic devices much like the other species do. Also, I think incorporating something about the telekinetic powers of this race would tie things together nicely. For example, Cloaks don't actually fly, they walk on thin air. The telekinetic powers also give it incredible speed and allow it to tolerate damage by blocking pain via the brain, etc. :wink1:

 

- Zombie

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CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted with the terrifying entity known to us as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will.

 

Though quite foreboding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks appear physically shunted once deprived of their garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with an underdeveloped musculature that seemingly supports only basic functionality and a skeletal structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment or stress and the subjects encountered so far don't use any kind of inherent armor. However, their garments are composed of latent alien alloy strands interwoven with filaments of unknown origin in similar fashion to that of chain mail.

 

Careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working more or less independent of each other, the Cloak mind seems to be divided into four adjoining quadrants which are capable of handling multiple complex tasks in unison. This divide and conquer approach speeds up processing of a problem and the interconnected brain is capable of tremendous feats of mental ability. An enlarged cerebellum found beneath the adjoining quadrants contained considerable traces of a naturally produced pain inhibitor that secreted into the higher portions of the brain. Whether this occurrence is a perminent circumstance or directly related to structural damage the body received currently remains unknown. The telekinetic potential for this being seems limitless and one can only speculate on its abilities therein.

 

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and management of the Alien Invasion Forces. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

 

mmmm alrighty how about something like this :)

 

RS's para tinker box

 

Careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working more or less independent of each other, the Cloak mind seems to be divided into four adjoining quadrants which are capable of handling multiple complex tasks in unison. This divide and conquer approach speeds up processing of a problem and the interconnected brain is capable of tremendous feats of mental ability. An enlarged cerebellum found beneath the adjoining quadrants contained considerable traces of a naturally produced pain inhibitor that secreted into the higher portions of the brain. Whether this chemical occurrence is a pre-existing one or directly brought about by anatomical damage done to the body currently remains unknown. The telekinetic potential for this being seems limitless and one can only speculate on its abilities therein. With no artificial implantions found during autopsy and field reports claiming deadly ?attributes?, it is highly likely the Cloak can telekinetically manipulated parts of its own mind, body, and perhaps even the very atmosphere around it.

Edited by RustedSoul
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double post sorry

 

CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted with the terrifying entity known to us as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will.

 

Though quite foreboding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks appear physically shunted once deprived of their garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with an underdeveloped musculature that seemingly supports only basic functionality and a skeletal structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment or stress and the subjects encountered so far don't use any kind of inherent armor. However, their garments are composed of latent alien alloy strands interwoven with filaments of unknown origin in similar fashion to that of chain mail.

 

Careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working more or less independent of each other, the Cloak mind seems to be divided into four adjoining quadrants which are capable of handling multiple complex tasks in unison. This divide and conquer approach speeds up processing of a problem and the interconnected brain is capable of tremendous feats of mental ability. An enlarged cerebellum found beneath the adjoining quadrants contained considerable traces of a pain inhibitor that secreted into the higher portions of the brain. Whether this chemical occurrence is a pre-existing one or directly brought about by anatomical damage done to the body currently remains unknown. With no artificial implantions found during autopsy and field reports claiming deadly attributes, it is highly likely the Cloak can telekinetically manipulated parts of its own mind, body, and perhaps even the very atmosphere around it.

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and management of the Alien Invasion Forces. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

Edited by Zombie
Merged posts.
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This is what I came up with. Green for additions, strikethroughs for deleted text and orange for rewrites. I tried to make the new part more fact-based and less conjecture. ^_^

 

CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted with the terrifying entity known to us as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will.

 

Though quite foreboding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks appear physically shunted once deprived of their garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with an underdeveloped musculature that seemingly supports only basic functionality and a skeletal structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment or stress and the subjects encountered so far don't use any kind of inherent armor. However, their garments are composed of latent alien alloy strands interwoven with filaments of unknown origin in similar fashion to that of chain mail.

 

Careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working more or less independent of each other, the Cloak mind seems to be divided into four adjoining quadrants which are capable of handling multiple complex tasks in unison. This divide and conquer approach speeds up processing of a problem and thus, the interconnected brain is capable of tremendous feats of mental ability. An enlarged cerebellum found beneath the adjoining quadrants contains and secretes considerable quantities of a pain inhibitor into the higher portions of the brain. The chemical occurrence is probably a pre-existing one or directly brought about by anatomical damage done to the body currently remains unknown. With no artificial implants found during the autopsy and field reports claiming deadly attributes, it is highly likely the Cloak can telekinetically manipulate parts of its own mind, body, and perhaps even the very atmosphere around it.

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and management of the Alien Invasion Forces. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

 

- Zombie

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Additional text

 

CLOAK AUTOPSY

X-Net://Pegasus.net/Alien/Autopsies/Cloak

 

Every recruit has it drilled into them from the beginning of their training: Keep your wits about you, and you'll live to see another day. Never has this age old saying had more meaning than when confronted with the terrifying entity known to us as the Cloak. Battlefield reports suggest that these creatures are insidious in their attack, bringing to bear tremendous mental power in an attempt to break or control a soldier's will. Its malevolent aura still striking fear within the very souls of the survivors.

 

Though quite foreboding in the characteristic clothing for which they are named after, Cloaks appear physically shunted once deprived of their garments. Their countenance and mystical appearance is based on an atrophied body, with an underdeveloped musculature that seemingly supports only basic functionality and a skeletal structure in similar condition. Their fragile bodies seem incapable of sustaining any physical punishment or stress and the subjects encountered so far don't use any kind of inherent armor. However, their garments are composed of latent alien alloy strands interwoven with filaments of unknown origin in similar fashion to that of chain mail.

 

Careful dissection of the corpse provides interesting details which may shed light on the purported power of these creatures. While the human brain is made up of two hemispheres working more or less independent of each other, the Cloak mind seems to be divided into four adjoining quadrants which are capable of handling multiple complex tasks in unison. This divide and conquer approach speeds up processing of a problem and thus, the interconnected brain is capable of tremendous feats of mental ability. An enlarged cerebellum found beneath the adjoining quadrants contains and secretes considerable quantities of a pain inhibitor into the higher portions of the brain. The chemical occurrence is probably a pre-existing one directly brought about by anatomical damage done to the body. With no artificial implants found during the autopsy and field reports claiming deadly attributes, it is likely the Cloak can telekinetically manipulate parts of its own mind, body, and perhaps even the very atmosphere around it.

 

The high level of intelligence and thought capability that Cloaks possess suggests that they play a major role in the leadership and management of the Alien Invasion Forces. Further study of these creatures, especially that of live specimens, may yield vital information as to the nature and source of the Alien threat.

 

"Did that guy ever eat? Disgusting, let's start dissecting him already..."

-Scientist at the start of the operation

Edited by RustedSoul
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Instead of:

 

Its malevolent aura still striking fear within the very souls of the survivors.

I was thinking something along the lines of this:

 

It's malevolent aura still strikes fear within the very souls of the survivors.

Rusty, is this what you were after? :)

 

- Zombie

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Instead of:

 

Its malevolent aura still striking fear within the very souls of the survivors.

I was thinking something along the lines of this:

 

It's malevolent aura still strikes fear within the very souls of the survivors.

Rusty, is this what you were after? :)

 

- Zombie

huh? Why It is? I think "its malevolent aura" fits perfectly. The Aura of the cloak is malevolent it is striking fear... Don't see why this should be reworded

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The way it stands now, "Its malevolent aura still striking fear within the very souls of the survivors." is an incomplete sentence. I switched "striking" to "strikes" which is a complete sentence. If you want to use the wording as it is, I suggest combining it with another sentence or rewording. Otherwise, forget what I said. :blink2:

 

- Zombie

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